I’m back…

Well not really.  I am still in Florida.  But I decided I needed to come here and let those few fans know that I am still alive.  Actually I am in paradise…to me anyway.

Heat and Hurricanes

Some people would say that I am nuts (‘you are correct, sir!” as Ed McMahon would say).  Because visiting Florida (my beloved birth state) in August is NOT the norm for most folks.  This is the month of intense heat AND the beginning of the dreaded hurricane season.  So as I was traveling south on the near deserted highways,  the northbound highways were packed.  And I guess that was the point in this warped native’s mind.

On the way, I stopped in Goosecreek, SC to see a dear friend/sister.  And then in Jesup, GA to see my step-daughter and grandchildren, where I enjoyed a manicure and pedicure with the girls.  It is always a pleasure to see these folks.

The Draw of the Sisters

Besides my true love of Florida,  I also migrate south each year to see family.  I have a beloved aunt , cousin and sisters here.  So I make my way to Jacksonville (cousin and aunt) then finally, across the state to the west coast to St. Petersburg…one of my favorite places on earth….the home of my sister and her partner of 26 years…who is now officially my sister in my heart and mind.

Magic Place

The home of my sisters is a magic place.  Their home is a showcase, really.  But while their house is a decorator’s dream, it is at the same time, warm, sunny and INVITING….just like it’s owners.  There are open spaces and also nooks to hide in with a good book.  The back yard is a haven of jungle type plants, fish pond, with a little waterfall, and a bricked patio in the middle, where you can enjoy the privacy, and the orchestra of sounds.  I find I feel very close to God in this setting.

Three very different cats have the run of the house and the back yard (via kitty doors).  Often they will follow you out to this patio, just to be sociable.  And there is comfort in their quiet company, also.

The Sisters

But the ladies themselves are the magnet that draws me here.  I am ALWAYS treated like royalty when I come here.  Good food, movies and gifts are showered upon me.  I am treated to new and unique restaurants that they discover and share with me.

They take me to see new sites, sunsets and manatees!!   I am also reunited with a group of their friends that over the years I have grown to love and consider as my friends too.  They all treat me as part of their larger family.  This is especially lovely for a person whose biological family has dwindled to a grand total of 4!!  (You folks with a large remaining family, please don’t take them for granted.)

Anyhow, I am lucky/blessed with good friends and Great sisters!  I guess you can see why I love it here.

Returning Home

Of course, I cannot stay here forever.  And I will be happy to return home to North Carolina (I’ve been there most of my life and I do love it too!)  But this has been a nice respite and I will miss all the folks that I have visited until next time.

So I will join the thousands of  “normal” people on that northbound highway in a few days.  (Send up a prayer for safe passage, please.)

The Recipe

Until then, let me leave you with a new recipe to try out.  I’ve been assured that this is good “comfort” food.  This is a mingling of two recipes from two different friends…so here goes:

Potato Tot Casserole

• 1 pound tater tots, cooked according to directions on bag
• 1 pound chicken tenders, cooked and shredded (optional)
• 1 small onion, sauteed in butter
• 8 ounces sour cream
• 1 can of cream of chicken soup (cream of potato or mushroom can be substituted)
• 1 bag of shredded cheddar cheese
• 1/2 cup milk

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
2. Mix sour cream, soup and milk together in big bowl.
3. Add 1/2 of cheese and mix well.
4. Add onion and butter mixture and again,  mix well.
5. Fold in tater tots and chicken.
6. Spread mixture into a greased casserole dish.
7. Cover and cook for 30  minutes @ 350 degrees.
8. Uncover and spread remaining cheese on top of casserole and cook  uncovered, for 10 – 15 minutes or until cheese on top is melted and bubbly.
9. Serve and enjoy.

I’m thinking about quitting   .   .   .   .

Sorry, lighting a cigarette.   But seriously, I am.  I’ve had this thought about a thousand times before.  Probably more like TEN- thousand, since I am an old fart.

THE LOSS OF INNOCENCE

I started at the ripe age of seventeen, in my first year of college at UNC-Charlotte.   This was actually pretty late, I discovered,  considering the fact that  both my parents smoked AND I had lived the greater part of my life in Winston-Salem, NC. – home of Reynolds Tobacco Co.   Most of my smoking classmates had started much earlier, like 10 or 11.   Again, this was North Carolina.

It was a boy-man who offered me my first one (among other firsts, we won’t get into).  It was heaven, all of it – hmm  .  .  .  .   Oh, ok,  I’m back.   But you see, I WAS a late-blooming, over- protected, Catholic girl, eager for adulthood and excitement.  And somehow, in my mind, this seemed to go along with smoking.

I won’t lie and say that smoking was the most harmful vice that I picked up in those early years, but it has been the most enduring..  With a lot of time, and more likely, the grace of God, I was able to shed some of the more harmful tendencies (a taste for over- drinking, , and a variety of other drugs, to name a few).   I did not escape unscathed, but I am alive today.  But I regress.

FALLING IN AND OUT OF SMOKE

I did quit a couple of times; once for  two years and once for TEN (!) years.  What an idiot, you say.  And, yes, you’re exactly right.   I was; I am.  In a moment of weakness and stress, I bummed one from a friend and then, another.  But in my defense, I felt it was my responsibility -to be fair and all- to see if that first one was actually that foul or if it was my imagination.   The second one was, of course, much better and it was on again.  So goes the reasoning of the true addict.  Oh shut up!! I KNOW every one of you true smoking fiends out there has done something similarly embarrassing.  I haven’t started digging old butts out of the ashtray yet.  (You folks know who you are).

PROS . . .

Anyhoo, the thought of quitting has crossed my mind, again.  On one hand, I have many reasons to do so.  It bugs non-smokers (ok, but some of them are REALLY good friends).  There’s the variety of medical reasons, high-lighted by my weakened immune system (caused by anti-rejection drugs that are protecting my borrowed liver).  Also,  I  have a vague desire to continue living, since I went through HELL to remain alive to get said liver, not forgetting family and friends who shared this hell with me.  So, medical reasons… and friends and family would be immensely pleased.  Those are the big reasons.  My finances would also be greatly improved.  I estimate that my smoking bill runs between $125 to $250 per month, depending on consumption and price.  Boy, who couldn’t use that??  And, quite honestly,  while I don’t mind the idea of being dead, I dread the PROCESS of dying.

AND CONS

But wishing don’t make it so  And there are a mess of reasons why I don’t want to quit.  I like it.  I do.  I enjoy the the taste of it, the feel of it and the motions of it.  It gives me comfort.  It is a crutch, I know, but it is also a social thing.  It gives you something to do when you have nothing to say.  In uncomfortable situations,  you can buy time to think while you light up.  Of course, there is also the connection you get with fellow harassed smokers. ( You know what I mean- soon they will be shooting us in public!).  And it helps (me at least,) to refrain from eating mass quantities

AND . . .  AGAIN

So I’m thinking about it.   My resolve seems to weaken as my pack gets lighter.  But I’m thinking about it.  Need some self discipline  and good motivation.  Need some gum and Dum-dums. Need some good advice from those who have had success (hint).  Need to run.  Need a prayer.

I’ll let you know how it goes.